Adesh I’m so glad about all the feelings and sensations that you talk about, your new movements and decitions, the plans to study and go to live to Stockholm. Having a partner Its a way to rediscover yourself and I hope this new discover cames with a gentle and confident company. I imagine like if a kind of complicity emerge and involve so many details in your lives.

Please, tell me why did you both decide to got engaged? related me more about this decition.

In a kind of way I understand the contrasting feelings of exitement and vulnerability. Do you feel that your inner independent child can share and communicate himself in a safe way? **Has your sense of security learned to dance with the unpredictable? Is there anything you want to release, improve or grab in this new engagment?**

Resently I saw a documentary, named “ la memoria infinita” maybe you should see it ( by the way you can find it in netflix) I’m not going to spoil you this magic piece, but I have a deep learning while I was watching it with Cami. It makes me think about the moments in wich I dobuted about the love that I gave and shared to my past relationships and how my lack of own-knowledge impact them. Also i feel the necesity to invoke my inner child and its joy, tenderness and curiosness as a . If you see it, let me know what do you feel. Let me know if any part of this documentary speaks to the orphan child who can now share itself and his independence with love and safety.

Andesh I’m really curious about you job and study decitions hehe? i want to know what do you think and how do you feel about working and study? Any resistance? some displeasure? or any job you “desire” or dream of? Do you work there for something special or just to solve some economic situations? Resently, I have been making peace with the coffee realm because when I was child, my grandma’s brother gave me strong and burnt coffee so I have been repparing the memory of my taste buds, also Cami work designing for some coffee farmers and roasters brands from latinoamerica and europe, because of him our cupboard its full of specialty coffee varieties form different parts of the world. Another curiose fact the Spanish guy who help me to sent you the letters is a wizard specialty coffee roaster, David lovingly treats the exotic coffee seeds that come to him from some farms in Mexico and Colombia…

To continue with the job issues, for a few weeks now I wanted to tell you that I quit my job. I had some work-related violence and I ask me why I’m supporting that shitty situation and yeah I knew that I was because **in a kind of way** my job offered such a smooth immigration process to Europe for my and my family (Cam and Emilio). So yes, here I am, a proud unemployed almost starting from scratch and putting into practice all the spiritual learning that I have had in better times therefore, the process to achive our plans suffered a little huge change, but it’s ok. I keep working on it. This time is a great relief. I've been doing some soul-searching lately and figuring out what I truly desire. In what kind of thing I want to explore and enhace my vital energy. This is much deeper than just a job loss.

Currently I’m facing some past gosths. But Cami, Emilio and the Mountain compains me in a calm, lovely and wizdom way. I’m trying to do my best in this enjoyful crisis. So you question about how I feel sharing and being in a dedicated relationship? I must confess although I have been in some relationships that asked me for commitment and dedication, I knew. before a pause in my small room during the pandemy, that if I decide to be involved in a new relationship i want to do it well, although I deeply did not understand the depth of this, but in my case doing it well has involved being vulnerable, communicating and sharing my insecurities and limits, facing patterns, take better care of the thing I love and, above all, acting with the wisdom of a child who wants to redeem herself.

You can’t imagine how I enjoy my independence within Cami and Emilio.